I’d just parked at the grocery store after church, knowing that I’d soon have to end my very long, very chaotic prayer that had started many, many minutes ago. It was pouring down rain all morning and as people ran into the store under umbrellas and to return shopping carts, I sat in my car, going through something. Every problem, every joy, every sorrow, every thanksgiving, I’d already brought up with God on the drive there, in that tumultuous order. I’d said everything I had to say, apparently thinking I should remind Jesus of everything I was feeling so that He could either fix my life or give me the encouragement I need until it gets better. I told Him I trust Him, whatever He decides.
And I stopped talking, and it got quiet.
I asked Him, “Well, what do you want me to do, Lord? Where do you want me to be? And also how can a person be so thankful for your joy and mercies, yet feel so miserable and bereft at the same time?”
And I heard nothing. And when that happen, I know exactly what to do.
I say, humbly, in the words of Samuel, “Speak Lord, for thy servant hereth.”
And I just wait, calmly. And listen. I’ve learned to not let my mind run miles around trying to decipher an answer. His voice is often slow, strong, and blunt. And it never gets old, when the Creator of the Universe speaks to your heart.
“Preach the Gospel.”
“What?” I asked, though hearing it clearly the first time. I wondered if it was just me, failing to listen. Making something up so there’d be an answer. It sounded so generic and strange, yet lofty and involved.
“Preach the Gospel.” He repeated.
“But Lord, I’m not very good at talking to people even in general. It’s not my gift. I’m good at writing instead.”
“Then write.”
“Where?” and I thought, well, I do have a website. . . “On my blog? I don’t really post anymore, would anyone even read it besides my family?”
“Don’t worry about that.”
So, I said thanks for the idea, grabbed my umbrella, went into the store, and bought chocolate milk and salsa.
Lo and behold, I open my dusty blog at home, and there’s a notification. It’s from today. It says, “Happy Anniversary! You registered your WordPress site 10 years ago today.”
Speechless, I was. There was absolutely no possible way I would have thought to open my blog today, on my own. I hadn’t touched it for almost a year. But if I hadn’t asked God what He wanted me to do and listened, I would have just passed by the milestone, maybe done a random vintage outfit post months from now. But that’s how I knew, “God, it was you. Not me. It wasn’t my idea. It was Yours.”
It reminded me that He is working so many complex little details together in our lives that we often never get to see. But this time, He showed me plainly that I will not be disappointed by listening to Him. He loves us, He knows when our hearts are hurting, He wants us to be close enough that talking and listening to His voice is a daily experience for us.
Seeing that notification also reminded me of another time God answered a question I asked. I was at work, in the middle of some farm task, praying and thinking about the most random things, as girls do. I asked God, “What’s your favorite musical instrument?” I tried to guess. “Violin, piano, the harp?”
“The voice.”
I smiled in awe. The farm animals around me think I’m crazy. I never would have initially thought of the voice as a musical instrument, that’s genius! “The voice. . .” I pondered.
“Because I created it.” He added. And it made so much sense, that I knew I couldn’t have just made that up. I’m not that smart. It was Him, not me. Positively. And that’s a good way to know if the voice you’re hearing is God’s, or your own. All throughout the four Gospels, people would continuously ask Jesus questions. And He would give sometimes the most unusual replies, replies the people never would have thought of on their own. Because God is all-knowing and omnipresent, of course He’s going to have a different perspective than us. And that’s wonderful, because when we accept His offer of not only salvation but of friendship too, we can then simply ask Him to guide us throughout our life. And the best person to get directions from is the mapmaker.
So, go ahead, ask those random or very specific questions. Then listen and have faith. The reply might just surprise you. God is working in your heart as much as He is in mine, and He’s working out all the little details far in advance. Even if one of those details is a little orange notification circle on a blog. He has many ways of speaking to us, reminding us, blessing us. But I think my favorite is hearing His direct words in my heart.
It’s been a very wonderful 10 years of writing on this website. I’m excited to see what God has coming up. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this, I know it’s not by accident. I’m listening to God’s voice, and I am not disappointed. And you are part of this journey; you are part of His plan.
…
Was there a moment when you heard God answer your question very directly?
Were you surprised by the answer?
